It can be the ultimate foreplay! Episode 4 of Intimately You with Dr. Jess and Luna Matatas, Sex & Pleasure Educator is all about oral. You’re going to learn tantalizing techniques to take pleasure with your partner off the charts!
“My husband always wants to go down on me, but I feel so self-conscious. I wasn’t raised to be open about my body, so how do I get over this to enjoy it? ~ Shanae
“We’ve been taught our bodies are dirty and that they smell, but what’s normal is really what’s great, sexy and a turn-on for your partner!” says Luna. “One thing that Shanae can do is to talk to their partner, because that invites the opportunity for empathy.” Luna also recommends getting out of our heads and into our body when we’re feeling insecure. “Grabbing the sheets or focusing on touching your partner — really trying to guide your senses to something else.”
Luna and Dr. Jess both encourage women to look at their vulva.
“It helps to demystify things. It helps to normalize things. It’s the same as anything else and the media representation of it,” explains Luna, adding that no one is perfect or the same.
“How do I know if I’m clean down there? I feel self-conscious about how I taste and smell. Should I use soap or something else down there?” ~ Bee
How to clean your vulva? Less is more! Simply wash with water and your hands! If you feel like you need something more, a mild cleanser is enough.
“I can’t go down on my husband because I developed a hypersensitive gag reflect after having my tonsils removed many years ago. Is there something else I can do? I want to give him more pleasure and I really do miss it too!” ~ JT
“I think there are a lot of misconceptions about penis pleasure anatomy. Most of the sensitive spots are closer to the head and the underside of the penis. So if you want to do some shallow BJs with your mouth covering the head of the penis and using your hand as an extension of your hand. You can get lots of stimulation for lots of the nerve endings,” explains Luna.
Luna’s Oral Sex Tips:
- Don’t just focus on the clitoris, but around the sides as well
- Adding a toy to oral can be stimulating and fun
- Make sure you always use lube
- Show enthusiasm
- Focus on your pleasure when you’re pleasuring your partner
Dr. Jess’ Oral Sex Tips:
- The “Cross My Fingers” technique encourages you to cross two of your fingers and insert them very gently in the vaginal canal
- The “W” stimulates the inner clitoris via the labia, by rubbing your hand slowly up and down, as your fingers are positioned like a W
- The “Nose” job uses your nose to grind against your partner —you can go up and down, side to side
- The “Claudia” is for guys! Interlace your fingers, lots of lube, pressure at the bottom, a twist at the top
- The “Cheater” uses your fingers to squeeze gently in conjunction with your lips
- Don’t forget the lube —TSC carries an assortment of flavoured and non-flavoured lubes
To watch Episode 3 or all the Intimately You episodes, visit TSC.ca/IntimatelyYou
Ask Dr. Jess! Wondering what product to buy? How to use it? Looking for relationship advice in the bedroom? Whatever your question, Dr. Jess is sure to have an answer! She excited to answer your questions, so don’t be shy! You can submit your question discreetly on TSC.ca/IntimatelyYou or by leaving a comment on the blog!