Intimately You

Intimately You! Episode 8: Reigniting Your Lost Libido

Have you lost your libido? Has your sex-drive dissolved? Whether it’s due to stress, hormonal issues, relationship tension or menopause, it happens to the best of us! Dr. Jess is joined by OB/GYN Dr. Jessica Shepherd in Episode 8, to delve into why this happens and help you to find ways to re-ignite the desire within.

“I have some arthritis in my hands and need a toy or sexual aid that can hold more easily. What do you recommend?” ~ Lois

Lovehoney Desire Luxury Rechargeable Vibrating Strapless Strap-On Dildo

With the longer handle and flexibility of the toy, it makes it easy to grip and hold from either end for anyone who may have arthritis or difficulty holding a toy.

According to Dr. Jessica Shepherd, OB/GYN, it’s very important to include sexual wellness in your overall wellness practice.

“As a gynecologist, I found that a lot of patients didn’t want to talk about sexuality or intimacy because they felt embarrassed by it. So I felt as a provider, it was my responsibility that I bring it into the conversation so that they can feel that it’s comfortable, safe and that they’re being heard.”

“A libido is a biological component of sexual wellness and there are so many different aspects of it. I think the most misconception about libido is that it’s an on/off switch. Really, it’s something that should be nurtured, paid attention too and as women get older, hormones are a big part of what contributes to libido. But don’t worry, we have so many different ways that can help!”

The first thing Dr. Shepherd checks when a patient complains about a low libido is questioning about their lifestyle. Has something happened recently? Looking at their emotional aspect of their life like a divorce or job. And also medication because there are some medications that can actually impact the libido.”

“Are there any foods or supplements I can take to boost my libido? I have zero interest since I had kids.” ~ Priyah

“A lot of women feel that way after they’ve had kids. So typically what happens after you’ve had kids is that mom component comes in where we struggle with how much emphasis we put into taking care of our kids, that we actually forget ourselves. You have to take time for yourself. Eating foods that are healthy, can actually help with our libido.”

“Can I use an internal vibrator if I’ve had a full hysterotomy?” ~ Sofia

“Yes, because you still have all your vaginal components,” says Dr. Shepherd. “You still have a lot of sensory components externally, so yes, please use a vibrator!”

“Is there anything I can do to “tighten up” down there so that I can regain sensation and also so I feel more confident after 3 kids?” ~ Saira

“After having children, you are going to have some changes in the pelvis that can impact your intimacy and how you feel,” says Dr. Shepherd.
“I love using energy devices that can be used in office where you can come and get treatments, but now there is a new device called the Tightra. It has radio frequency energy, that is very safe to use. It decreases the laxity of your vagina and helps improve your sensation and revitalize the nerves.”

Silk’n Tightra Vaginal Tightening Technology

Tightra is a safe and effective intimate wellness solution for stress urinary incontinence and vaginal laxity. Clinically tested, Tightra is the first and only home-use device that utilizes Radio Frequency, a medically proven technology that increases blood flow and boosts elastin and collagen production tightening the pelvic floor muscles and reducing urinary incontinence. Vaginal tightening also improves sexual function and vulvovaginal appearance.

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“I’m always dry and it’s uncomfortable. What treatment can you recommend?” ~ Terra

“There are so many ways to relieve vaginal dryness. If you’re in your 30s, 40s, 50s, you can use a variety of lubricants. If you are menopausal, look with your doctor about possible hormones, but also devices that can help with lubrication,” says Dr. Shepherd.

Tips to revive your lost libido from Dr. Jess:

Get yourself in the mood. Responsive Desire = Arousal First

  • Fantasize
  • Use a toy
  • Read something sexy
  • Work out
  • Touch yourself
  • Clear time to relax
  • Learn to be selfish

To watch Episode 8 or all the Intimately You episodes, visit

Ask Dr. Jess! Wondering what product to buy? How to use it? Looking for relationship advice in the bedroom? Whatever your question, Dr. Jess is sure to have an answer! She excited to answer your questions, so don’t be shy!  You can submit your question discreetly on or by leaving a comment on the blog!

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